Did you get a drunk text last night? Naked Justin Bieber was out having a chardonnay… or three. He lost count and passed out before he could even post a photo, so here he is a day late and, as you can see, someone captured a moment of his intoxication. Yes, NJB was dancing on the bar with wine glass in hand, that little scamp.
Rumor has it, he texted Skipper, the Snow White action figure, and one of the Bratz dolls somewhere around 2am. Tsk tsk, NJB. You should know better than to drink and dial!
After chilling out yesterday, Naked Justin Bieber found himself needing to snuggle up with an NJB-sized furry blanket. He found himself a warm toaster near the party cups. You never know when you might need a hot toddy and toast during the cool winter months after all.
Naked Justin Bieber had the exciting opportunity to stop in to a local Sub Zero Ice Cream Shop! This isn’t just plain old ice cream… nope, this is science in the form of using liquid nitrogen to make ice cream while you wait and watch. It’s all kinds of fun and a great way for NJB to chill out this holiday season.
No shame in doing your holiday shopping where most things are 99 cents according to Naked Justin Bieber. You’ll find him poppin’ tags wherever the Christmas Spirit takes him. He’s not scared to really get caught up in his holiday shopping either. Hope you’re having a ball this Christmas, you know NJB certainly is…
It’s that time of year you’ve all been waiting for! Naked Justin Bieber has returned to wish you all a very happy holiday season. He’s been plucking out some Christmas tunes on this Rick & Morty/Gravity Falls adorned ukulele. We heard him playing such fabulous tunes as “Deck the Halls (with my pants)” and “The Little (fully clothed) Drummer Boy.”
How are you getting your holiday season started? NJB can’t wait to spend this December with you!
With recent news events, Naked Justin Bieber wants to reassure you that he’s fine and that any photos released by that vindictive Instagram hacker were not related in any way to him. In fact, NJB is here for you. He wants you to let him know your concerns, worries, fears, and also what makes you happy.
“Gosh! Golly! Gee!” he says, “Nobody should have to go through what my predecessor and his ex-girlfriend are going though. I feel totes like they’ve both been seriously violated and I’m not OK with it.”
When we were in the initial planning stages of our vacation, the one thing Naked Justin Bieber was most excited about was the chance to meet the most beautiful woman of Deep Space Nine. His fascination and love of Leeta had been prominent in every planning discussion, and when he saw that Chase Masterson would be a guest on the cruise, NJB was beyond elated. The chance to meet his favorite Dabo girl, wife of Rom, and alternate identity of such and amazing and kind philanthropist was first and foremost in his mind. You can see him here waiting for her arrival in her own titular lounge with stage and appropriately set mood lighting. Leeta was very gracious and welcoming of all her fans and friends and stopped to pose for a picture with NJB. I don’t think he’s washed his face since.
On Day 3 of the Star Trek Cruise, the notorious (and awesome) Q held a masquerade ball. Naked Justin Bieber simply could not come up with a costume, however he did don a mask for the occasion. Sadly, he forgot to include eye holes and struggled a bit with getting around the ship. We found NJB in the Stardust Theater waiting to enjoy the “Crews Feud” game show. He may have been sleeping, but we’ll never actually know, will we?
It was a good day to die drink! Naked Justin Bieber attended the Klingon Pub Crawl during the Star Trek Cruise. The pub crawl was three bars in an hour with drinks overflowing for twenty minutes at each location. After the twenty minutes was up, the crawl would meander in a large group to the next location whilst greeting all we passed with a good and hearty “Qapla‘!”
Chancellor Gowron, son of M’Rel, upon meeting NJB quite loudly announced to all in the room, “I LOVE YOUR WEIRD DOLL!”
Our first stop on our amazing vacation with Naked Justin Bieber was Miami, Florida. We met up with some friends, had some coffee, and took in the local sites. This particular claw machine was located at The Alchemist, a restaurant in Wilton Manors, Florida. NJB insisted that he could “catch em’ all” and I’m pretty sure all he “caught” was a sore wrist.